I'm losing myself...

Tonight we went out to dinner because A-I didn't feel like making anything and (more importantly) B-we were celebrating.  Celebrating what?  Well, never you mind. Oh, and C-we got a free entree. Anyway, I was feeding the baby girls their mush food before ours came and getting a little frustrated that Avery kept sticking her fingers in her food-filled mouth and Lila kept lunging at the spoon and gagging herself.  All of a sudden it hit me: look at me--I'm totally a mom.

Before we left for the restaurant I put on my shoes, didn't re-do my hair from earlier in the day, didn't put back on the necklace that I had let Lila chew on and didn't check my clothes for spots, which by the end of the day there inevitably are.  We just went to Red Robin, which is not a fancy place, but the fact remains: I'm losing my sense of dignity and pride in my appearance.  Perhaps I had too much to begin with and a little less vanity is a good thing.  However, I'm a girly kind of girl who likes to get dressed up and put makeup on and many times, as shallow as it may seem, feeling l present well makes me feel pretty good.  So, is it vanity or just part of my personality?

When Ty was born and I started my staying at home lifestyle, I vowed to put on real clothes everyday.  I stuck with my no-all-day-pajama-days goal well.  Partly, it made me feel like I had accomplished something and was ready for the day to begin.  Since the twins have come, many days seem to begin without me and I find myself running into the babies' room in my bathrobe to rescue a lass from her crying.  I then have to wait for the breakfast-feeding, diapering, clothes-changing, and settling in to some kind of morning distraction before I can actually put some clothes on.  My "morning" shower finally gets its turn at 11:30 and many times my routine ends abruptly with my drippy hair still wrapped in a towel to fix something really important like a dropped binky or the purple corvette's wheel stuck in the soccer net...again.  That's why ponytails were invented, I guess.

Sometimes in the evenings I change into comfy clothes/pajamas and think, "Why don't I wear this stuff more often?"  Then again, the days where I wear pajama-y clothes all day and don't do my hair or put on makeup (those days are becoming more frequent) I don't feel as "comfy" in my own skin and don't like that I haven't prettied up a bit.  Is it wrong that my self-satisfaction is tied so closely to my reflection in the mirror?  Am I immature?  It bothers me that I'm starting not to care about my appearance/me as much, so why do I care that I don't care?  Bah...  This is probably why I shouldn't write blog posts late at night.  And here you were expecting pictures of some cute kids.  Well, I've got lots of those...cute kids and pictures. ;)

This is from a few months ago, but I realized since I'm the primary picture taker, I have few pictures of myself actually in them!  A sleepy-looking self portrait with Lila will have to do.

 These are my children watching Cars in the morning while I run to the shower.  :)

[I didn't take any pictures tonight, but these next few are from the last time we went to Red Robin for Russell's birthday, early February.]

Avery just ordered a toy...that's all she felt like eating.

 Happy Lila girl!

 Father and son

 Silly father and sillier son!

Russell's a very nice dad and forked over the 2 quarters it cost for Ty to play the car racing game.  Russell even did the pedals for the kid and let him sit on his leg to drive.  :)

A month or so ago I did get my hair cut...that was good.  I asked for it to be as short as possible to still be able to be pulled back. It is a little shorter in the back and a lot more thinned, plus professionally straitened and done without time constraints.  That may have something to do with the overall goodness of it. (I was making a goofy face because I don't like mirror pictures and always feel silly taking them.) 

Okay, I really feel like I should say I DO DO DO ("Hehe...she said 'doo-doo!'"  Just anticipating what Russell's gonna say.) love my kids and am so glad that I have a husband that supports me staying home with them to try to take good care of them.  I would shave my head, wear nothing but garbage bags, and cover our mirrors for them if I had to in a hot second.

Bathing Beauties

Last Saturday night Russell and Ty went to the Monster Truck World Finals held here in Las Vegas every year.  They had a blast and will probably make it a tradition.  This means that Lila, Avery, and I will have to keep our Girls' Night tradition, too!  They're not exactly the best at partying hearty--our night started with poopy diapers and ended with baths.  In the middle I ate cheesecake and a microwave meal and they ate some baby mush and "we" watched a chick flick.  Anyway, they were being SO cute during bath time and I didn't have to worry about getting Ty in the bath tub, too so I took a few pictures with my phone.
(WARNING: baby booties ahead.)

Before getting into the bath, the girlies were wrastlin' on the floor.  They both were having fun getting each other.  I should have kept score...

 I love how Avery is totally fish-hooking Lila...

 ...But Lila is totally grabbing Avery's ear and head. (You gotta watch out for your hair and ears around that one--she'll pull 'em!)

 Nakey Avery!

 If this was clearer, I'd add some effects and frame it for the bathroom wall. 

 For some crazy reason, I decided that I wanted to try and put them in the same tub.  I have no idea why I thought they would fit; they hardly fit in there one at a time! 

 Clean enough...

Snapshot: Our Family Today

I don't really know why, but I'm feeling a bit emotional right now.  I guess there's just a lot of...no, I really don't know why.  Whatever.  Okay, now I'm crying--what the heck?!  I sat down to write about what's going on in our fam, ya know, what this blog is supposed to be about, and I guess I'm a bit overcome with what's happened since I really wrote.  Taking a "snapshot" of our little lives makes me happy.  Is everything perfect?  Absolutely no, but I'm happy.  Okay, here's what's up with all of us, Christmas card style:

Russell: doing his last clinical rotation for his DPT degree at UNLV.  In like 75ish days he'll graduate and become an actual physical therapist!  He's for sure counting down and is feeling ready to get this career going.  (I might actually miss a bit of the "school" life...but I'm not the one in school!)  Russell puts in some long days and I appreciate him and his hard work.  I really feel for him right now because there's a lot of big stuff coming up: final paper and presentation on the 3-year research project he's been working on, applying/interviewing for jobs, working full days for free, studying for the national licensing exam on April 30th, and still coming home to a not-always(ever)-clean home and 3 bitty kids who love him and want his attention.  Ty LOVES his daddy, as he should, but he's been extra attached lately.  When Russell does boy scouts stuff sometimes Ty will join him and just hang out.

Carolyn: I'm trying to reach some kind of normalcy and adjust my expectations to an appropriate level considering our circumstances.  It's a work in progress, but I feel much more like myself than I did a few months ago.  (More on that postpartum/recovery another day.)  I need to reel in the buying clothes/accessories for our kids, but sometimes it's so hard to pass up a good deal.  I need more friends who need me to buy stuff for their kids/babies. I'd so be all over that.  No, really though, we do try to get out and sometimes it works.  ;) I can't remember a day when we didn't all get clothes on.  My non-makeup days are becoming more frequent and I cut my hair, which makes it quicker to do/wash.  I fear I'm turning into a MOM, like full-on mom jeans-wearing, no care-for-appearance, every sentence starts with "well, MY kids...," no sense of self interest, mom.  I have a few areas to step it up in, including cleaning and personal enrichment.  I think thus far I have the feeding, dressing, and playing with kids thing under control.  (Speaking of which, we've got a poopy one...pause in the writing action for a stink-change break!  I'm back--false alarm.)  SO, now I'm a substitute teacher in Relief Society and I get to teach this Sunday, which I'm excited about.  the lesson is on becoming perfect a little every day--a very good lesson to familiarize myself with.  I still take a dance class on Monday nights and I still have fun.  I really just love to dance, which is also why we got a Kinect to go with the xbox so that I can have some more physical activity/work out at home that's actually fun to do.  When you come over, we can play together. :)

Ty-Ty:
-2 1/2 now!
-weighs roughly 32 lbs.  He likes to stand on our scale and will tell others to get on it, too.  So inviting.
-still way into numbers, recognizes numbers like 83, 76, and starting to get some hundreds down.  Counts up to 70 last we checked, I think.
-loves letters and spelling now!  he knows the alphabet and sounds that the letters make and tries to find what letter words start with. He's doing that whole, "What does d-f-g-h-h-r-a-i-w-f-e-d spell?"  He sometimes will sound out words; the other day he read the word "gum" by himself.  Smartypants.
-Cars.  For some reason, he doesn't actually request to watch Cars every morning like he used to!  He's still so into his matchbox/hot wheels cars (he has ~40) and pointing out BMWs, Mercedes, Jeeps, and every other kind of car on the road.  This kid could sit by a busy street all day...but we don't let him, because that's not very safe.
-Ty's ears work well.  He swears he knows what kind of car is driving by when he hears an engine roar, "Did you hear that Mustang, Mommy?"  The other night Russell and I were discussing what happenend to all of our phone chargers (I lost them) and Ty, who was trying to sleep yelled from his room, "Stop saying words, guys, okay?!" Funny.
-Lots of funny stuff comes out of his mouth, which I'm trying to keep record of on a word document.  Yesterday he had "Frosted Mini Leaves" for breakfast.  :)  He does speak pretty clearly and well, though.
-Ty boy loves his sisters.  He used to say/scream, "Stop lelling [yelling] it!" when they cried, but now he stays calm and says, "Don't worry, baby girl."  He often tells us that he needs to go see his "Lolla girl" or "Avery L'Wayne" and gives them kisses.  He also likes to wrestle with them and is rougher than I would like, but the girls are usually laughing, so I guess it's okay.  Sometimes they cry, and obviously it's not.  He's never intentionally mean to them, thank goodness.
-He's starting to know when he's funny and hams it up.  We have to work on keeping a straight face when naughty stuff he does is also funny.
-Ty has an alternate personality: Baby Hoey. (Yes, he named himself.)  Baby Hoey likes to sit in the babies' seats and eat little puffs like them and sometimes be carried like a baby and talks in a baby voice.  I can't wait until "Baby Hoey" is potty trained, though...don't hold your breath for anytime soon.
-When Ty gets his teeth brushed, Russell has been saying the names of Seattle Seahawks players (or all of the NFL franchises or the 50 states.)  Now when Ty plays football, he's either "Marshall Lunch" or "Golden Tate" instead of just himself.  Usually Russell will be Russell Wilson, too.
-He just grew taller!  I know this because all of a sudden his 2T pants are all too short.  Good thing it's about shorts season anyway.
-We make deals all of the time ("eat 4 more bites then you can have some more chocolate milk") and sometimes he says stuff like "I get my cars then I can play your phone, okay?  That was my deal."  He catches on pretty quickly, but that's not exactly a "deal..."
-Speaking of which, he's very good at playing with/figuring out our phones and his tablet.  Child of a new generation!
-He answers about every question with "I don't know..." then proceeds to say the actual answer.  It's a funny little tick.

Avery:
As of 6-month check up 3/8/13
 weight: 15 lbs 13 oz, 45%
 height: 26.25", 65%
 head: 17.25" 90%

-Yes, there are differences in the girls' personalities.  FYI.
-Avey Baby is a very social little girl.  She wants to be where the action is and will cry if she's left in a room by herself
-she's a great sleeper and napper.  Hooray!  Seriously, usually all you have to do is lay her down with a binky and she's asleep.  Sometimes I go to get Lila out of her crib because she's crying and Avery is just laying there awake and happy.
-Avery doesn't fuss, she's either happy or sobbing with her gravely, loud, such-a-sad-face cry.
-sometimes she'll get startled by stuff that makes her cry, like sometimes Lila being loud, sometimes someone looking at her, ya know, whatever.
-Usually if she's sad, when I (or someone else) looks at her, she's happy again.  This girl has smiles to share with everyone, a very happy baby.
-Both the girls love spitting/blowing raspberries
-sometimes spits up like a fountain
-rolls front to back and back to front
-smiles with her whole face, including her big blue eyes--love it.
-chews on fingers lots--hers, yours, it doesn't matter
-loves grabbing her bare feet!
-has a fun time in the bath tub kicking!
-is a big fan of eating food.  When I feed the girls I alternate giving bites; a lot of times Avery is waiting with her mouth open.  :)  When we're eating dinner sometimes I'll give her some little cereal puffs, too so she's happy.  She even tries to grab them (turns into her chasing them around the high chair tray) and put them in her mouth.  Avery is yet to be successful on this front, but it's so fun to watch her little mind work. 

Lila:
As of 6-month check up 3/8/13
 weight: 16 lbs., 50%
 height: 25.75", 40%
 head: 17", 80%
-sometimes looks like a little doll--so pretty with light blue eyes, long lashes, and a sweet smile.
-I love her chubby, rosy cheeks when she wakes up!  They're so, so kissable. Plus, she smiles with them and they get even bigger!
-like Avery likes to be looked at/talked to, Lila likes to be held and physically played with
-tries to "talk" to Avery (or nobody) with little shrieks and squeals
-rolls...usually...front to back, but not the other way.
-loves this little hippo toy that wobbles and plays music when you hit it. Sometimes she'll be whining then go straight to a big smile when she sees it--cute.
-not quite as interested in the eating food thing as her sister, but is getting the hang of it
-a very good grabber of hair, shirts, arms, toys, etc.
-laughs and smiles at Ty more than anyone else.  She loves her big brother!
-sometimes gets a little fussy, but has such a cute sad face
-a good night-sleeper and decent napper
-spits up like a flock of birds: little drops all over
-big snuggler/cuddler, little sweetheart
-when she's crying, if you walk outside, she stops.  Works like a charm.  I don't think she's every been outside and cranky, she's a great stroller rider!
-understands how some toys work better than her sister, plays with things instead of just chewing on them
-chunky thighs=loves.
-big fan of the Johnny Jump-Up (bouncey thing hanging in the doorway) and will hang out--literally--for a while and drool and squeal to herself

Phew!  That was long...with many interruptions, trust me.  I'll add pictures soon!